I have the sadz

and they just wont go away.

I have 2 more working days until I am unemployed. Yeah, yeah its good because I may find a job that I like but it still sucks. Something happened on Friday that really upset me at work but I'm not even gonna waste my energy to type it and bore you. I just want to be done and get on with the next chapter of my life.

I don't do change.

Ive talked about this before but it still bothers me that I don't have a BFF. I miss my old one who chose the party life. The one who wants to call herself my BFF....I just don't connect with her for many reasons. We are friends but it just isn't there. So why do I get all jealous when she is talking on FB to another friend about hanging out. I push people away and I want to stop doing that but I haven't met anyone lately that I click with.

Madison's party is Saturday. Oh good, we aren't having it around her Sept 6 birthday so she will be in school longer and it will work out better. Uh yeah, wrong. First she is having it at the movies and we are seeing Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.....they STILL haven't released the showtimes yet. I just asked for the kids for 4hrs and we will work around a time and they can play the other time. OK whatever, the invites go out with the 4hr time. 2 sisters haven't said no but its 90% they aren't coming because they have a game that day, a cousin party and their sister's birthday was to go to the movies that evening. Just say no already....ugh. Hannah probably wont come because one of the sisters is the only one she knows.....haven't heard from her mom yet. Ashton's mom called today and said they were going out of town that weekend to see a football game. She was allowed to invite 5 girls because, including herself, that would be all that would fit in my Pilot. Ava is coming and that's it. That makes me sooooo sad for her. I am sending in 2 more invites tomorrow to 2 other little girls. Who cares if they only have a weeks notice. What are they going to say? No wont hurt anything at this point.

AF is due Friday so I'm sure thats contributing to my sadz but good grief......I just feel like I'm in a transition stage of life and have no idea where to go or what to do. I hate not being in control.

Add to that the fact that we had company today and an ADORABLE 3 mo old baby girl was at my house most of the day. I wanted her.